The first time you meet with your D-Group sets the tone for your journey together over the next 12-18 months. Before you meet with your group, spend time praying for each member individually by name. We have a phrase at our church, "discipleship is started and sustained by prayer." Before you go to your group on God's behalf, go to God on your group's behalf, asking him to move in each of their lives for growth and transformation. The initial meeting is an important time to allow the group members to get to know each other and, perhaps more importantly, for you to find out where each of them are in their walk. The relationships that are developed in this group will be the primary context for growth and transformation. So relationship development is key to the first meeting. Be sure to listen, and even take notes on the things that are shared.
-Share testimonies. Go around and give each person a chance to share the story of how God saved them.
-Share family details. Allow each person to talk about their families, their spouse or significant other, their careers, ttheir hobbies and interests, their birthdays, anything you think might be helpful for the other people in the group who may not know each other that well to develop a relationship.
-Share desired areas of growth or struggle. Ask each person to share what they hope to get out of the group. Also depending on the "feel" of how things are going, you may want to ask them to share one or two struggles that they hope God will free them from over your time together.
-Share contact information. I have found that creating a group text or chat with members of the D-Group allows for easy communication, sharing of prayer requests, and relationship development.
Another thing you will want to make sure to do is lay the groundwork for scheduling and expectations. I believe it is valuable to reiterate the expected formal meeting times, and also share your desire for informal life on life time with each of them. During this time you may want to explain how a d-group works and what the purpose of a d-group is. You will want to raise the bar of expectation, asking them to count the cost of being committed to this group for the long haul. Don't be afraid to allow them to walk away on the front end if it's not something they think they can be committed to. Remember, when Jesus invited the disciples in Matthew 4:19, He told them exactly where he desired to take them. "And he said to them, "Follow me, and I will make you fishers of men." (emphasis mine) One of the most important things for the group members to understand is that this relationship is not meant to be a Bible study, but a time of training and equipping for them to one day have a ministry of their own to make disciples in the church.
-Schedule. Remind them of day, time, and location. Emphasize the length of a typical group, and help them understand that there will be an end in sight. (We are not staying together forever.)
-Ask for an agreement. Ask the members of the group to verbally commit to: Attendance, discipline to finish assignments, being available for spontaneous sharing life, honesty and transparency, reproducing a group of their own in God's timing. You may even want to consider a written covenant. Many have done this, and it has proven to raise the bar on commitment.
The last ingredient to a good first d-group meeting is settling on a Bible reading plan that the group will read through together. No matter the volume of reading (4 a day, half a chapter a day, 2 chapters a day), we want to encourage groups to read through the Bible together at the same pace for mutual growth and accountability in God's word. If you are planning on reading any supplemental books alongside the Bible, you would assign those during this time as well. (Note: If all you did was read through a Bible reading plan together and helped each other apply what you read in everyday life, you are well on your way to effective discipleship.
Disciple Makers Breakfast
On Saturday, January 12th, 2019 at 9 AM in the World Cafe of Fegenbush Campus, we will have our first Disciple Makers Breakfast of the year. Come engage with our discipleship team along with other d-group leaders from around the church. We will assess growth measurements for d-groups, hear testimonies, and coach through practical challenges and best practices in discipleship. This breakfast is for anyone who is leading or planning to lead d-groups. For food purposes we need to know how many plan to attend, so please register by responding to this email by Jan 4th. We hope you will join.